foam, wheat grass and The Whole...

I had words with a woman at Whole Foods last week. I was waiting at the juice bar for my healthy little juice while furiously snacking on dark chocolate almonds - they are just.so.good. I believe health can come even from chocolate if it is purchased at The Whole. So this woman starts getting snippy with an employee about wheat grass. Hundreds of people were just murdered in Syria and she chooses wheat grass. She is ranting on and on about how he is messing up the foam. The foam of grass! Her exact words were, "You idiot, you're doing it wrong." Now imagine this employee to be the human equivalent of Eeyore wearing an apron and the woman being Camille from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, first season, wearing fake boobs.  Friends I could not stand for it any longer. I knew that my years of defending band nerds from football players had prepared me for this moment. And so I, the heroine with long flowing locks wearing the leather jumpsuit worn by Black Widow in the Avengers, spoke.

"Ma'am if you're so unhappy with it than go somewhere else."

She slowly turned her head in my direction like it was on a swivel. I popped in another almond as if to say 'bring it'.

She went on and on again about how he's an idiot and he's doing it wrong and she's been to places where celebrities go and they all strain the foam and he's doing it wrong!

"Ma'am you're being incredibly rude and you need to calm down."

She did not heed my advice and turned it up a notch. Oh boy did she yell.

"Well he IS an idiot and who cares about him!!!"

"I do lady. Go somewhere else if you're so unhappy. Look at all these people in line who think he's doing just fine." I could see their smiles and I felt their pride. I let it go to my head just for a moment.

Her tantrum took an unexpected turn, "This is the reason why California is the worst and going down the tubes! Nobody wants to do anything right! This state is horrible!"

"Then go somewhere else."

Now we can all speak up when there is unsightly foam in our wheat grass but let's do it with class shall we - everyone matters.